Hungry. Angry. Lonely. Tired. All of these feelings can trigger cravings. Anyone can get off track when they’re feeling uncomfortable but alcoholics and addicts are particularly vulnerable. Relapses, especially in early sobriety, can often be set off by little things. When we’re physically or emotionally off balance those little things can feel overwhelming and suddenly a drink or a drug looks really good.
Acronyms are big in the recovery community. It kind of drove me crazy when I first got sober. There are acronyms for FEAR: (False Evidence Appearing Real). Acronyms for a SLIP: (Sobriety Losing Its Priority).
Acronyms for FINE: (F-ed up, Insecure, Neurotic and Emotional). And of course for those who struggle with the whole higher power thing, acronyms for GOD: (Group Of Drunks, Good Orderly Direction, Gift Of Desperation and more).
When I first heard the acronym HALT I was intrigued. I started to connect mind and body and to recognize that I often drank and used to change the way I felt when there might have been a healthier response. And then I started to modify the acronym to incorporate my own triggers. I added a “C” (CHALT) for cold. There were many times that I thought a drink would “warm me up”. There were tailgates and aprés ski parties, outdoor barbecues and music festivals. Alcohol actually LOWERS your body temperature, but funny thing...a few drinks and you start to forget that you were cold.
And then I added an “S” (CHALTS) for sick. Because when you’re sick, all rules are suspended. From hot toddies to NyQuil to prescription painkillers, the potential for abuse looms large.
I had a bad bout of shingles a couple of years ago. It was the by far the worst pain I’ve ever experienced. For 6 weeks I was on my hands and knees crying every night, and the lingering nerve pain lasted for months. My doctor recommended several medications which I know can be addictive and I was sorely tempted. Many people suggested pot, edibles and other forms of marijuana. “At least it will help you sleep” said some. Sleep? Weed never made me sleep, I loved it!
I was desperate for relief but I’d heard too many horror stories about people getting hooked on prescription drugs and spiraling back into addiction, so I powered through. I read up on holistic health and quantum healing and the polyvagal theory. I learned that when I was working out, practicing yoga or meditating, the pain lessened dramatically. I found relief in simply using my voice: singing, talking, writing and just engaging with friends.
That brings me to another acronym. HOPE: Hang On, Pain Ends.
Eventually it did.
And here are two more for FEAR:
F*** Everything And Run
Face Everything And Recover.
We have a choice.
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